Kahuna Hash #51, Monday, March 26th
Hare: Reservoir Tip and Pole Dancer
Location: Raleigh Park in Raleigh Hills, Portland

19 Hounds gathered along with my bombastic beagle just taking in the air of virgins ready to be
deflowered or possibly vice versa as virgins decided to show that they were born to hash..

per Gym Nasty - Sung to Born to Run

On Mondays the day we checked it out in the streets of a runaway kahuna dream
At night we ride through monsoons of glory in swamp laden machines
Sprung from hashes out on highway 8,
Running uphill, beer injected and steppin out into the swamp
Baby this rips the shoes from your ankles
Its a back check, an uphill false trail
We gotta get to shortcut while the hares where young
cause hashers like us, baby we were born to fun

Slut Machine let me check I wanna be your friend
The stitch and bitch want to guard your dreams and visions
Gym Nasty wrap your legs round these velvet rims
As Pabst Smear follows true trail up a hill
Together we could break this check
Rectal Ran till he dropped, Just Zachary was aghast
Will you hash with me out on the quamgire
cause Hydrolicks you have mud up in side you
Cause Wild Man gotta find out how it feels
Merkin Ride wants to know if mud is pliable,
Bimbo I want to know if the trail is true

Beyond the swamp filled-muddy late spring muck
Resevoir Tip filled hash cum loads
The bimbos drink their cheap beer mantras,
And the wankers try to look so hard
Screams Her Own Name rises bold and stark
Hashers huddled in the park in the dark
They wanna do a down down with you Slut Machine
In an everlasting abyss....

Sorry for the diversion

The highlight of the night......

The beer check in the swamp by the paper

machine which we had to forage through

down a slippery hill and through a swamp that smelled

like 44 day old panties. The paper vending

machine added a touch of surrealism

as did the monster hill near the end and Rectal

Rooter pulling leached off his ...well I am not going there.

All in all shitty shitty virgin hare delowering.

The hares put alot of thought into pulled

it off with out a hitch.

Unfortunately per Flaming Fart and Tool Box's

lofty standards the perfectness of the night may

have limited the crowd.

Down Downs were executed by El Machino Slut. The hares

made their's vanish. Zack from Portland and another pretty bimbo

did virgin down downs. Food was warm and plentiful. We feasted on

31 bean soup and bread.

Notes from the Stitch and Bitch

(You know the group, you pass them 10 times during a hash but

they are always in front of you) and they always have a well placed

wise ass comment as you go by.

• Next weeks its Pabst doing a joint, full moon.


• Merkin hares this Wednesday in the Mall 205 area.


• The hash turns one in two weeks. Wildman hosts the gala event.


• Lucy the dog got named little Shitter


• Slut Machine baked some great vegan cookies.


• Downtown has all it figured out

Someday bimbo I dont know when were gonna get to that on in
Where we really want to get a swamp infested rash
But till then tramps like us baby we were born to hash

Well done Hares.

Would have stayed longer but HyfroLicks was wearing sandels

Which somehow reminded me how cold I was.

Gleefull Submitted

B1g Sj1tt#r's Dog